Dating Information

How to Overcome The Fear of Rejection


Feeling uncomfortable in the stomach, cold sweaty palm, trembling of legs, losing the ability to think correctly when approaching a girl? Hate yourself for not able to overcome this problem? Oh? please do not feel so. Believe me, you are not the only one facing this problem. In fact, this is a very common problem in man. Everyone is just like you, not willing to admit it openly, having the fear of being laughed and mocked by others. But there's absolutely nothing wrong for feeling so.

Well approaching a girl, asking her out for a date isn't really as scary as you thought. For all you may know, the girl is just as or even more nervous than you. Some guys are born with the natural flair with girls while some guys are just born shy. But that doesn't mean that they can't do as good. In fact, shy men are whom most girls are looking for. It's a pity that all the good men are hiding up leaving the girls with not much of a choice but to hang out with the jerks.

So how can you overcome your fear? Well, this is something that I can't help you. You simply just got to make that first step, that very first attempt. Hmm? still feeling too nervous? Ok, perhaps we should take things a little slower. There's actually no urgent need for you to just walk up to a girl and ask her out for a date. Too sudden? You might just scare her off. But please, don't take for ages before someone else try to cut in the queue. I don't suppose you memorized your whole school textbook before going for your exams? It's the same thing, you don't need to wait till you fully overcome your fear before you approach a girl.

Hmm? anyway, I should believe that the both of you are at least like normal friends? Classmates? Colleagues or?? Whatever it is, grab any chance to get closer to her. Too shy to strike a conversation with her? Look her in the eyes, drop her a nice warm smile. Make her notice you, make her remember you, let her know that you exist! You be surprised, your eyes can actually work more wonders than to words at times. All these will eventually boost the chance of success when approaching her at a later date. She will naturally feel more comfortable with you than to be approached by a total stranger.

Ok, now that you have done all of what you can do, no more excuses from you! Stop hiding up, it's time to make your move. Now, I want you to follow very closely after me. Take a deep breathe, gather all your courage. She is sitting all alone on the bench under the tree. Slowly and steady, you walk towards her. Yes, step by step getting nearer and nearer. She turns and saw you approaching. Remember, she has seen you before, she knows who you are. Now look her in the eyes, smile at her. She greets you with her nice gentle smile. One final step, you stop in front of her. "Hi, what a coincides to see you here", you say to her in a nice, friendly voice. "Busy with anything now? How about a little coffee together?" Smiling so sweetly at you she replies teasingly, "Your treat? Sure why not??"

Hey you still with me? Ha sorry, was just trying to play a little game of hypnosis with you. Did I fare horribly? Well anyway, it would really be so lovely if things were as what I had described? Why not? Why couldn't it be possible? You see, the problem with most people is that they always tend to create negative thoughts; creating an image of failure, an image of been rejected in their mind before things actually happen. Subconsciously, they have actually rejected themselves before anyone else could even reject them and yes, the likely chances is they will fail. Just like in soccer matches, when David Beckham scores from his spectacular free kick? If at the moment before he even lifts his feet, he was creating the image of ballooning away the ball over the goal post in his mind, you think he will score? So why not picture things the other way round, telling your mind; yourself that you are going to make it? It will definitely boosts your confidence and the chance of a success.

Hmm? hope you are feeling more comfortable and less nervous now? Well, the chance of being rejected is nonetheless still there. So what should happen if you really fail? You should learn to graciously accept the rejection. It's perfectly alright, my friend. At least you know you have tried? You finally pluck out that courage? There's nothing to feel ashamed of. Picture it this way; you are the one being approached instead. Approached by a girl that's not of your type. You would have rejected her as well, wouldn't you? But would you make fun of her, laugh and mock at her? I should believe not? Instead, you would have felt happy and thankful to her; it's just a pity that she's not your type of girl? That's exactly how the girl whom rejected you would have felt too; it's just a pity that you are not her type of guy. Nobody would be laughing at you, probably they would be admiring you for your courage instead.

Though you might be rejected but believe me, once there's a first time the rest will just come naturally. You might be sad and disappointed but once you get yourself back, you would have remembered that it wasn't as scary what you had thought. You would have probably already overcome a great deal of your fear. It's just like the first time driving out on your own after getting your license. For some unlucky ones, meeting up with a little accident. But that doesn't stop them from driving on? In fact, experiences were gained. So was confidence along the way, driving more smoothly, stepping even harder on the accelerator?

Well, rejection is part and parcel of life. It's not only in love that you get rejected. In life, you are faced with more rejections. Rejections from your work? Your boss? Your business associates? Even your own family? But that won't stop you from moving on in life?

Last but not least, there's one thing you have to accept. The fact that, you are a man! It's afterall still the guy's job to do the asking. You just gotta do it and I am sure you can do it yeah?

Rick Valens
Staff Writer
http://www.loveletterbox.com
Love Relationship Discussion Forum

NOTE: You're free to republish this article on your website, in your newsletter, in your e-book or in other publications provided that the article is reproduced in its entirety, including the author information and all live website link as above.


MORE RESOURCES:

Thaindian.com

Clooney was cheated while dating
Times of India, India - 5 hours ago
George Clooney’s former ladylove Sarah Larson cheated on him with a media mogul while they were dating, it has emerged. According to reports, the former ...
Sarah Larson cheated on The Clooney?! Impossible! Infos Jeunes France
Clooney's ex turns zero in her choice of dates Oneindia
all 16 news articles


Playing dating game
Chicago Tribune, United States - 16 hours ago
By Teddy Greenstein | Chicago Tribune reporter A chance encounter at a buffet set the table for Saturday's Utah-Michigan game. And the almighty ABC/ESPN ...


As LDS teens begin dating, crushes and religion don't always match up
Salt Lake Tribune, United States - 5 hours ago
The message for Mormon teens is to stay away from "steady dating," Browning explains. At 16, only if they feel ready, are they free to casually date and go ...


The Frisky

Seven Signs You May Be Dating A
The Frisky, Georgia - 2 hours ago
At first, when we found out David Duchovny had checked himself into rehab for sex addiction, we were like, “Damn, that’s kind of hot.” But that was naive. ...


Easy Roommate is like speed dating for flatmates
Times Online, UK - Aug 28, 2008
If this sounds hellishly like speed-dating that's because it is. Glasses clink and hesitant Londoners check each other out before striking up a conversation ...


Michael Phelps On TV And Dating
Access Hollywood - 6 hours ago
“I am not dating Stephanie Rice,” Phelps tells Billy Bush, dismissing the latest dating rumor that he’s coupled with the Australian Olympic swimmer. ...


A Perfect Business with the Perfect Dating Software
Corsavoo.com, France - 20 hours ago
In order to have a great and functional websites you should order dating script software. This is the dating software that will empower your website with ...


News Line 365

Sayali: Too early to talk of ‘dating
Times of India, India - Aug 28, 2008
Right now, we’re not dating, but are thinking about it. It’s too early to say that I’m ‘dating’ him. We’ve been in and out of touch since IPL, ...
Sayali Bhagat dating Shoaib Malik Oneindia
Its official! Sayali is dating Shoaib Times of India
all 5 news articles


Canada.com

"Green" is the latest trend in niche dating
Canada.com, Canada - Aug 27, 2008
Although staying home and getting naked with the one you love is probably as green as it gets in the dating department, eco-sensitive singles are like ...


When single moms start dating again
USA Weekend - 18 hours ago
I want to start dating again. How soon should I bring up the fact that I have a child? Also, now that I'm "dating for two," how much weight should his ...

Dating - Google News

home | site map
© 2006